Oh the wonder of it all

I've always believed in loving as deeply as I can, actually not so much a belief as it being part of who I am without a concept that it could or should be different. But, presently, I'm thinking that I may have to errect a barrier against such unbridled emotions. Experience and much deliberation has led me to the conclusion that hurt,disappointment and loss, trumps all the strawberry cheesecake emotions of love, expectation and hope or rather a desire of forever.
It just never happens. Loving is making a martyr of ur heart, its knowing that one day you will be placing ur heart on a stake and on that fateful day it WILL be sacrificed.
I've felt the euphoria of romantic love,the comfort and assurance of filial love, the privilEge of the platonic love of friends, the unconditional and unmerited love of my parents and siblings, the mutual adoration for the innocent hearts of nieces and nephews, and even meeting or hearing of someone who immediately awakens an awareness of the possibility of love... But I've discovered that nothing prepares you for the loss in whatever form it takes. And more so when that loss, that parting of paths forever comes in the permanent form of death. There is no comparison to it... no prepAration for it. Never has a truth been more accurately uttered as "it is what it is, and cannot be otherwise".
Love is sweet, gentle and elevating. It caresses the heart and soul and awakens an awareness of beauty in the most mundane and love knows no drudgery. Love is like cherryblossoms- beautiful beyond expression, awakening all your senses but gentle and oh so fragile. But loss, loss is like a force of nature, a tornado, or any other natural disaster for that matter, that uproots,destabilizes, leaving nothing recognizable in its wake. Only memories of what was. As sweet, gentle, spiritually and aesthetically uplifting as it is,  cherryblossoms,bless them, don't stand a chance.
Now I do believe in love, love for family, friends, lovers but its at a risk... the risk of loss. The more people you love and the greater the intensity of the love, the greater the chances of loss, devastation and in some cases- annihilation- if one values one self based on that physical manifestation.
I'm not pessimistic and I'm certainly not going to hide from the inevitable - love always translates to loss on some level... I guess its knowing that and choosing to love as deeply and meaningfully as you can so that when the physical manifestation no longer lingers in this earthly sphere,the elevating  legacy  of love would lasts beyond death,beyond loss. For if love should be anything, it should should be elevating and the nobility, the transformative power of that love and integrity of that love cannot- or more accurately- should not be lost.
I chose to qualify that last statement  because I used to believe that it, (love, and what it leaves behind)  could not be lost, but  I've recently realised that sometimes those that survive the loss have to go beyond themselves to ensure that its not lost... for the honour of legacy and the gift to posterity. We have to remember those who were not only for our sakes but for those younger ones to whom we have the honour of passing along in the oral traditions- the lessons- that can change their lives but also the lives of those yet to come. So to that end, I just may reconsider errecting that barrier and embrace love and all it brings, even if I'm placing my heart on a stake... for I've realised as well that in the face of loss, LOVE and those that embodied Love, was almost always worth the anguish of the loss...